When you’re a broke minister who can’t find a job – it can make for some hard times, especially when you have to watch your wife work harder than you are.
Amanda has been very patiently working to keep us afloat and while I did have a couple of speaking engagements over the past 3 weeks, times are still hard. I’m sure most of you know what it means to make sacrifices.
Well – one of the things I have noticed – in the midst of waiting to get hired by someone is that knowing we have to do certain things at certain times keeps us moving. People are like water – if they don’t keep moving, they will become stagnant.
“Babe? What did you do today?” Amanda asks. Well – I did the dishes, vacuumed, made the bed, and applied for jobs – and read. All of this put together probably takes me 2 or 3 hours.
If you don’t realize it then – that leaves me with about 10 hours of nothing to do. I would look for anything to do. I would study and read – look up more job opportunities. Yet, I was sitting in the same place, and it was starting to get depressing because I felt like I wasn’t doing anything worthwhile. I had starting getting stagnant.
“What can I do to change this?” I asked myself. “Everyone in the world has the same amount of hours in their day – you just need to figure out how to make better use of your time.”
So I wrote out a little schedule for my day – to make sure that I just didn’t have nothing to do. I thought of every little possible task I could find that could relate to what I wanted to do for the day, and then it hit me.
“You need to schedule time everyday to do something to surprise Amanda.” I thought to myself. So I began to jot down little projects I could do to make Amanda know how much I appreciate her.
Like I said earlier though – we have to be careful with what we spend. So I had to work with what we already had.
Now when Amanda and I moved into our place, she had some reprints of some paintings that she wanted framed. However – their size was very awkward, and we purchased some very large picture frames to frame them in. It was very disappointing when we discovered that they wouldn’t even fit those large picture frames. She loved these pictures too.
So this was going to be my evening project for her. I decided that I would custom cut the reprint to fit the frame – something she was reluctant to consider doing , at first. All in all – it took me a couple of hours, but I was very pleased with the end result.
When she got home that evening – I had made full use of my day, and she was very surprised and pleased with how well the end result turned out.
But I say all of this because it gave me an idea. From here on out – it should be my goal to schedule out time everyday to invest in my wife. Honestly – when people get busy – they will often say “Leave me alone – I’m too busy and need to focus.” Then when people get time off – they will often say “I’m just wanting to relax. Why are you bothering me?”
At the end of the day – I realized that whatever I had planned to do is whatever I usually do well. It is the fact that we often do not intently plan time to invest in the ones we care about that results with us not taking the time to do things that show that we care about them.
I know it was just a few pictures – but to Amanda it was “I appreciate and love you.”
When I finally get hired by someone and life gets busy again – I will be so very glad that I have begun to make it a habit to schedule time everyday to plan or do something to show Amanda that I love her. Because a love life is also just as prone to getting stagnant for lack of movement – as your professional life.
So schedule out time everyday – or at least a few times a week – to do something to show the people you claim to care about how much you really care. Trust me – it is worth it to them.